Remember when I thought chemo would just get easier and easier with each passing round? That’s not, as it turns out, how chemo works. Chemo works by kicking cancer while it’s down, and unfortunately when cancer’s down, I’m down, too, so I get kicked, as well. The drugs build up in my body and leave me exhausted, nauseous, shaky. I’ve spent the last three days trying to go into a coma, largely with the help of some nice drugs they gave me at the doctor’s office. I was able to sleep for hours today, which was grand, though it didn’t make up for the hours of sleeplessness last night.
Finding that I could sleep no more, I sent myself on a mission to obtain a spinach bagel with roasted red pepper cream cheese – not a long walk, but it sounded like something I could put in my body. I’m still having horrible hot flashes – my oncologist thinks I am actually in menopause, but she’s optimistic that it will prove temporary.
When I told my college advisor that I had cancer, he said, “Take care, be strong, and defeat this.” I repeat this to myself from time to time. I am stronger than this. I will defeat it. Each day brings me another day closer to feeling better.
You will beat it, we come from tough stock. OK, final, last offer to send you Mendo Meds for the nausea and loss of appetite. Might help a bit with the sleep thing too. Your doctors can’t or won’t tell you about it but ask them anyway. I don’t think it will turn you into a lethargic deadhead hippie if you’re worried about side effects, besides, you’re not growing dreadlocks any time soon.
That’s nice of you, but I’m all right. Anyway, if you sent it in the mail it’d be a federal offense and we can’t have that. But thanks very much for offering!
And if you talk about sending it on the magical tubes of the interweb it is not so subtle.
The bagel sounds pretty nice.
Yeah, I haven’t had a good bagel since I was last in LA. It’s a tincture by the way, very mailable but ’nuff said. Recommended listening, “the old dope peddler” Tom Lehrer.
My brother, the dope dealer.
Hang in there, kiddo, brighter days are coming.